[Fox]

 Cathy, on 19 April 2013 - 07:36 PM, said:

I suggest you deleting it right away. I was almost banned for that kind of shit.

Too late, it has already been quoted.

[Lunick]

 Fox, on 19 April 2013 - 08:25 PM, said:

Too late, it has already been quoted.

[Person of Color]

YA'LL KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?!

[Lunick]

 486DX2, on 19 April 2013 - 10:07 PM, said:

YA'LL KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?!

[Sangman]

Yeah, it's 14:18 here.

[Lunick]

[Inspector Lagomorf]

Lunick, on 19 April 2013 - 10:24 PM, said:

That show is the reason why I drink orange soda today.

[Zaxtor]

Hank smoked weed.




PS lil off subject

And oldest man in Japan turned 116 last night.

[Hank]

Hank looks like a pot head.

[Kathy]

[summoning Sangman]
I'd like to talk about dating sites experience.

[Sangman]

I'm just about to leave the house now, but I could tell you about stuff some other time.

[Kathy]

No need to be hasty anyway.

I just I like to know the whole process. I know you went on a date. But how did the thing go before that? Did you PM lots of people?

I'm on a verge of making account on a dating site, but it still feels rather stupid.

[Person of Color]

The WiiU is the Sega CD's illegitimate grandson.

[Sangman]

Cathy, on 20 April 2013 - 10:11 AM, said:

No need to be hasty anyway.

I just I like to know the whole process. I know you went on a date. But how did the thing go before that? Did you PM lots of people?

I'm on a verge of making account on a dating site, but it still feels rather stupid.

So far I've actually dated 2 women. The history of the first one is probably well-known because I share more on this forum than I probably should but a brief recap: kinda liked her, was thrilled she also liked me, got waaaaay too excited, moved too fast both physically and emotionally and pretty soon it turned out she was quite mentally unstable which is a negativity that I didn't need. Basically she called me up crying about dumb shit right before we were supposed to go out. Was pretty shocked by that experience but I lived. I actually gave her a second chance later, had a fun night with her and wanted to see her again... but again she called right before a date. Felt like I should leave her alone so I did and I haven't heard from her since.

Then last month I dated someone else for a week, was more cautious about it and took some time to get to know her. She seemed mentally sound but unfortunately she was also a complete idiot. An uninteresting weak personality and none of our interests matched. In fact on our second date I had such a wrong feeling about continuing to date her that I literally felt sick. I didn't feel better until I got home, got my senses together and told her I didn't feel like seeing her again. She took it personally and called me an asshole. Probably she wanted me to say it in real life but I don't feel like I have an obligation to do that if we're still "just dating".

What your question is concerned... there were a couple of days where I sent lots of messages... Some humorous, some serious, some flirtatious, ... most of them unsuccesful by which I mean maybe 2 to 3 out of 10 messages will actually get a reply. Then I start talking to people who replied and what mostly happens is that either they don't reply further, or they turn out to be superboring and impossible to hold a conversation with. An example is someone who mentioned on her profile that she didn't like SF movies which is cool and all so I sent her a message asking her why she didn't. She replied friendly with an answer that was a full paragraph... but nothing I could really reply to. So I responded with a different question, got another novel in return... But nothing. No return questions... The long answers make me believe she may have been interested, but only answering and never asking forces the other member of a dialogue to keep moving the conversation forward. Pretty tiring and makes you seem boring.

Nowadays, though, I only send a message to people who seem genuinely interesting... Still barely get replies and when I do they still turn out to be dull. But I still hold hope that one day I'll find someone who has a kickass personality without looking like Jabba. (call me an arse if you wish but you know just as well as I do that it matters)

I'm trying to give less of a shit about it though because constantly thinking about that stuff will end up driving you up the wall and you'll find it difficult to enjoy any other activity. The nagging thought "you have to find a mate" is constantly there and if you don't keep a tight leash on it, it can be maddening. I'm not too ashamed to admit that some weeks ago I went to a party and after leaving I cried myself to sleep because once again I didn't meet the love of my life there. Pathetic stuff, I know. Right now I actually want to focus on moving out of the house, and after that maybe learn a couple more languages like Russian and Chinese because why not.

So basically I'd say give online dating a try and I'm sure you'll meet people eventually but don't expect earth-shattering miracles (if you do find a perfect match though that's awesome) and sure as shit don't waste entire evenings browsing them and spamming messages like a desperate idiot as I have.

[Kathy]

Sangman, on 20 April 2013 - 04:12 PM, said:

Then last month I dated someone else for a week, was more cautious about it and took some time to get to know her. She seemed mentally sound but unfortunately she was also a complete idiot. An uninteresting weak personality and none of our interests matched.

Shouldn't that have been cleared before an actual meeting?

Quote

An example is someone who mentioned on her profile that she didn't like SF movies which is cool and all so I sent her a message asking her why she didn't. She replied friendly with an answer that was a full paragraph... but nothing I could really reply to. So I responded with a different question, got another novel in return... But nothing. No return questions... The long answers make me believe she may have been interested, but only answering and never asking forces the other member of a dialogue to keep moving the conversation forward. Pretty tiring and makes you seem boring.

Shit, that's exactly what happened to me the last time I dated. I felt like a dumbass cause I couldn't reply in the same vain as my date. The person might be interesting, but if you can't match that with something else then you're screwed. Or maybe I'm just an idiot.

Quote

I'm trying to give less of a shit about it though because constantly thinking about that stuff will end up driving you up the wall and you'll find it difficult to enjoy any other activity. The nagging thought "you have to find a mate" is constantly there and if you don't keep a tight leash on it, it can be maddening.

For me it's not about "have to find a mate", but more about "I need to socialise". Sometimes I think I'd rather have a cat. But the thought of it touching and ruining MY STUFF is frightening.

Quote

I'm not too ashamed to admit that some weeks ago I went to a party and after leaving I cried myself to sleep because once again I didn't meet the love of my life there. Pathetic stuff, I know.

Quote

Right now I actually want to focus on moving out of the house, and after that maybe learn a couple more languages like Russian and Chinese because why not.

But why exactly these languages?

Quote

So basically I'd say give online dating a try and I'm sure you'll meet people eventually but don't expect earth-shattering miracles (if you do find a perfect match though that's awesome) and sure as shit don't waste entire evenings browsing them and spamming messages like a desperate idiot as I have.

But your experience is underwhelming. Given that the entire thing seems way stupid for me, general inadequacy at "normal dating" and a pessimistic look at things I can't imagine actual date going smooth.

And did anyone write to you?

Btw, is it bad lying about your age on the dating site? Cause... I look and act way younger than I actually am.

[Sangman]

Cathy, on 20 April 2013 - 05:11 PM, said:

Shouldn't that have been cleared before an actual meeting?

Haha, yeah, but after only one night of talking she was like "let's date IRL" and I was like "sure why not".

Quote

For me it's not about "have to find a mate", but more about "I need to socialise".

When I'm around people I can stand socializing is not much of an issue. I often do have a hard time talking to or liking 'strangers' though. After coming back from Germany I felt bored sitting at home so I started visiting a bar of sorts also frequented by a good friend of mine. Even after months of visiting there I didn't have more than meaningless small talk conversations with the people there. Needless to say I don't often go there anymore except for events my friend insists I have to show up for... and I feel kindof bored/antisocial when I'm there. It's a poisonous place that always makes me feel down somewhat.

Quote

But why exactly these languages?

Because I believe them both to be highly relevant languages and that knowing them even to only a small degree may be important in the future. Today, English is the main lingua franca, but China is a growing economic superpower and an important shareholder even in Western companies these days. Perhaps it won't be in our lifetimes that the Chinese language will become common even in the West but I believe that eventually it will happen. Not saying it's a bad thing at all, just saying maybe some preparations could be made. Even if that doesn't happen I still want to visit China someday

As for Russian, the company I work at is expanding to the East as well (meaning Eastern Europe) where obviously Russian is an important language. Having knowledge of that I think would benefit me professionally - plus I already took some basic classes during my time in Germany and found it quite interesting.

Quote

But your experience is underwhelming. Given that the entire thing seems way stupid for me, general inadequacy at "normal dating" and a pessimistic look at things I can't imagine actual date going smooth.

You'd think that but I've been surprised in that regard. When I go out on a date so far I have had no trouble in getting girls to like me and even invite them into their place. The problem is usually the other way around in that I'll find some quality in them that I find extremely disconcerting which completely takes away my interest.

When you meet the person who is right for you, it'll click. I know too many people who have been like me but ended up so desperate they just kindof picked whatever girl semi-liked them even if it totally didn't work... For a while they're walking on sunshine but ultimately that road only leads to further heartbreak. They always say the perfect woman doesn't exist which is very much true but what does exist is the woman who is perfect for you.

[Kathy]

Sangman, on 20 April 2013 - 05:23 PM, said:

Because I believe them both to be highly relevant languages and that knowing them even to only a small degree may be important in the future. Today, English is the main lingua franca, but China is a growing economic superpower and an important shareholder even in Western companies these days. Perhaps it won't be in our lifetimes that the Chinese language will become common even in the West but I believe that eventually it will happen. Not saying it's a bad thing at all, just saying maybe some preparations could be made. Even if that doesn't happen I still want to visit China someday

I'd rather learn japanese because it would be way better to experience many games and movies. I'm not an "otaku", but I do have enough japanese movies and videogames to warrant learning japanese above other languages.

Quote

As for Russian, the company I work at is expanding to the East as well (meaning Eastern Europe) where obviously Russian is an important language. Having knowledge of that I think would benefit me professionally - plus I already took some basic classes during my time in Germany and found it quite interesting.

I know some russian, too.

Quote

When you meet the person who is right for you, it'll click. I know too many people who have been like me but ended up so desperate they just kindof picked whatever girl semi-liked them even if it totally didn't work... For a while they're walking on sunshine but ultimately that road only leads to further heartbreak. They always say the perfect woman doesn't exist which is very much true but what does exist is the woman who is perfect for you.

I don't like the attitude of picking anyone. For some fun and non-commited relationship - maybe, but not for a lasting and stable one.

[Sangman]

Cathy, on 20 April 2013 - 05:41 PM, said:

I'd rather learn japanese because it would be way better to experience many games and movies. I'm not an "otaku", but I do have enough japanese movies and videogames to warrant learning japanese above other languages.

So what's stopping you?

[Fox]

Japanese is a pain.

[Kathy]

Sangman, on 21 April 2013 - 02:44 AM, said:

So what's stopping you?

Laziness. And I don't really need that desperately. At least I know english good enough.

I meant that from all the languages japanese would be the most logical choice for me to learn. Or maybe french.

[Jeff]

Most of my foreign language skills come from watching TV.

Krycek: Did you see what happened here?
Dmitri: Da.
Krycek: Too bad for you.

[Fox]

I learned English from the Internet and Sitcoms.

[Mark]

I took German classes in 7th and 8th grade. A lot of it has been lost from decades of little usage. Between what I remember and universal hand gestures I could get by for a while on a visit.

The only Spanish I know is from TV so I only know how to insult somebody.

[Hank]

I never learned English. They told me to watch a lot of TV. I tried that. After like two days ABC (Soaps/The Price is OK etc) I swtched the TV off, I still can't watch TV. Went to the movies instead, picked up some new friends and sort of oozed into this language.

One good thing about America, it's very easy to make friends.

@ Fox - and yes, Japanese is very difficult and their TV also sucks bad.

[Master Fibbles]

The Price is Right. Although, who knows, because of our economy, it might be "The Price is OK" now.

[Hank]

This was thirty five years ago. I remember you spin a huge wheel and act exited, then the show switched to 'real' tv commercials ... and I switched off.

[Person of Color]

[Jeff]

Mark., on 21 April 2013 - 05:45 AM, said:

The only Spanish I know is from TV so I only know how to insult somebody.

From 24:

Hector: If he doesn't crack soon, use gasoline.
Spanish dude: Si petrol. (yes, gasoline)

Also, bueno is good. Like I said many months ago, I know a couple words from different languages, but not enough to string a sentence together.

X-Files:

Langly: More Huevos Rancheros!
Frohike: Maas Huevos Rancheros. (more)
Byers: Por Favor. (please)

[Master Fibbles]

I have a feeling that I need to sound more excited in my cover letters and emails to people I send my resume to. Maybe if I add more words like "excited" and "opportunity" I will get more bites.

[Fox]

La concha de tu madre. Someone told me that after I teamkilled him in Bad Company 2.