[Forge]

MrBlackCat, on 29 March 2014 - 12:33 PM, said:

This is Duke4... I would expect it to recorded and in the "Post Your Videos" thread... there has to already be one.

MrBlackCat

[Jimmy]

Protected by Viper, on 29 March 2014 - 01:15 PM, said:

Don't bother watching them, Jimmy. I'll get you the suckjob of the millenium at a tranny bar in Greenwich.

"Only men know how to please other men."

[Fox]

[Idiotska]

Fox, on 29 March 2014 - 01:58 PM, said:

I'm a goat owner myself, so I went out and asked my goats what they thought about Goat Simulator.

[The Commander]

Forge, on 29 March 2014 - 10:07 AM, said:

will you just fuck already and get it over with

I only go on top, but IF he is lucky he might get a reach around.

[Jimmy]

I am so hard right now.

[Forge]

The Commander, on 29 March 2014 - 03:22 PM, said:

I only go on top, but IF he is lucky he might get a reach around.

you should still hit it from up front.

like that old saying, "we don't do it 'cause we're gay, we do it to see the expression on their face".

[Lunick]

[Master Fibbles]

Countries mapped by what they lead the world in.

Discuss in the most racist way possible.

[High Treason]

I have decided I'm going to try and get my life back on the rails;

1. Do voluntary work - it will break up the day and won't affect my incoming money as I can not afford to work for real (I would if I could).
2. Go out at the weekend - probably just sit in a corner at the pub and soak up the atmosphere.

These are simple objectives but I've been a shut-in for so long that they need to be simple or I'll just back out. In short, it's a start.


As I write this I am mildly intoxicated so I apologize for any spelling or grammatical errors. On the up side, maybe you have to be to appreciate this thread, usually I think it's shit but I'm laughing at it right now, especially that map, by all means call me a fascist, I regularly get called a Nazi anyway.

[Person of Color]

If you have severe anxiety about going out in public, take pills, I'm talking shit like Xanax or Valium, then after you feel well enough wean yourself off of them. Don't stay on them. Be a bad goy.

I've never needed to do that, but I know someone who did. It helped a lot. Just don't mix them with liquor or you'll be two beers away from queer.

[High Treason]

Unfortunately I'm unable to take this medication due to a bad reaction, I'm not even sure I should be drinking to be honest.

My anxiety tends to peak during the build up to doing something, like going out for a walk; I start worrying about it and don't go out, or I used to. The thing is, I decided to slap myself in the face and do it anyway at which point I actually felt much better than I had sat indoors doing as little as walking across the estate. It's always been the same, I worried like mad about going to college back when I was doing that, but once I got there I felt fine and had a lot of fun... Except the last year I was there, that just sucked.

[Person of Color]

Sitting inside for long periods of time fucks you up. After I spent a month and a half powering through all the Mass Effect games I was pretty screwed up. Other people noticed it too. I was just really spaced out and stressed out, and I became hypersocial within a few days. And I'm a fucking extrovert.

[Person of Color]

Word of advice - if you can swing it, get a car. Even if you drive around aimlessly with no place to go, it totally cures cabin fever. Sometimes I'll just drive to another town 20-30 minutes away and look around for things to do. Grab some lunch and chill out on a pier, than scout some local shops. It's amazing with the top down and that V8 rumble in your ear for the whole journey.

[Forge]

Protected by Viper, on 29 March 2014 - 07:51 PM, said:

It's amazing with the top down and that V8 rumble in your ear for the whole journey.

he's from england/british isles

he doesn't know what a v-8 is
he'd drown if he drove around with the top down

High Treason, on 29 March 2014 - 07:17 PM, said:

I have decided I'm going to try and get my life back on the rails;

just go to a football/soccer match. nothing like punching people in the face to create social bonds

[High Treason]

Tried that a few years ago but they were reluctant to hand over a provisional license, so I gave up, though I've been thinking of trying again recently, I just have to deal with the money side of things right now as constant rent and tax increases are stretching my bank balance to the limit. At the very least I do plan on repairing the bike as it's better than nothing.

@Edit; Forge hadn't posted when I wrote that... Believe me, I know what a V8 is, my favorite car is the 1970 Plymouth Cuda, and the only ones worth bothering with are the V8 models - my father worked in that industry anyway, so I've probably seen engines you've never heard of... Though I get the feeling I'll never be able to afford one so I'll likely end up with a crappy Vauxhall Corsa or something... Wouldn't mind an old Lada though, if you're going to drive a crappy car you may as well do it properly.


Problem with sport is I don't like any of the sports that are around here, though I do live practically next door to the local rugby team's stadium that was recently revamped, might be worth a look around as I did used to go there every week when I was a teenager. As for soccer though, that's a faggots game (not that there's anything wrong with being gay), it costs a small fortune to get in and you couldn't pay me enough to go and watch that when I can watch gay pr0n online for free.

[Gambini]

So I was in my time machine reliving scenes of my life and how I remember all details of the previous moments of being involved in a physical fight. Because it is among the most adrenaline-intensive situations of a person´s life (unless you´re a fucking phsico) I guess it puts the recording machine in full quality. I got involved in two fights as an adult; very little compared to my child/teen records which were of about three or four per year. While with the pass of time I learned better tricks to make myself respetable, while kid I would often get abused by schoolpartners to which I wouldn´t stand still and just punch them and beat their asses off (most times at least). Yet, when adult it becomes as a very very last resort as a problem solver, so it´s natural that you remember everything of it, as it had to be a very limit situation.

So I was thinking that I´d write about those memories but while I wrote the last pharagraph I realized that nobody would give a damn about it and that I´m not even sure why I´m writting this.

[Idiotska]

When you went back in time did you remember that one really embarrassing thing you did in school or as a kid in general that one time?
Nobody else does.. but now you do... again.

(my memory was spouting internet memes in public in the pre-social media era, and when I did people would stare at me like a disgusting freak.. ugh, you blew it, young me)

[Gambini]

I remember once having a fart inside of me waiting for the green light and I waiting everybody on the class go to the break except a few buddies around that would laught with it, and then I letting it go making an incredible noise and then noticing the nerd girl on the other corner was still there and her scared expression, but it actually was a lot of fun and we laughted out loud. Sorry to dissapoint you but I don´t remember many embarrasing things of my life, I guess i forgot about them.

[Fox]

Huh, when you realize how futile the society is, you stop worrying about what the others think, and there isn't much to fell embarrassed about anymore.

[Gambini]

That´s a sad thruth. But there´s a lot of reflection in society, although it´s not all, be hostile and you will be treated in a hostil way, be disdainful, arrogant, indifferent and you will be treated the same way. Be polite and you will be sometines treated politely.

[Ronin]

Gambini, on 29 March 2014 - 11:53 PM, said:

So I was in my time machine reliving scenes of my life and how I remember all details of the previous moments of being involved in a physical fight. Because it is among the most adrenaline-intensive situations of a person´s life (unless you´re a fucking phsico) I guess it puts the recording machine in full quality. I got involved in two fights as an adult; very little compared to my child/teen records which were of about three or four per year. While with the pass of time I learned better tricks to make myself respetable, while kid I would often get abused by schoolpartners to which I wouldn´t stand still and just punch them and beat their asses off (most times at least). Yet, when adult it becomes as a very very last resort as a problem solver, so it´s natural that you remember everything of it, as it had to be a very limit situation.

So I was thinking that I´d write about those memories but while I wrote the last pharagraph I realized that nobody would give a damn about it and that I´m not even sure why I´m writting this.

Funny you should say that you have clear memory of fighting, I used to fight a lot when I was younger and most fights are a blur to me, I remember the before (making the decision to fight), the after (joy or winning or shittyness of losing) but only flashes from the actual fights. I haven't really been a fight in a couple of years and I kind of miss it, as nothing makes you feel more alive and it's funny how you don't really feel any pain until after. I don't think there is a greater natural high than winning a fight you go into expecting to lose.

[Gambini]

Quote

how I remember all details of the previous moments of being involved in a physical fight.

I mean more or less the same as you, from the actual fights I have flashes too, I don´t think they´re blurry but yeah what´s in detail there is all the previous shit. I have to say, though -now that im sober- is that I never enjoyed it actually or had fun with it. Many times in my life I´m underrated because I don´t look "tough", so people think im gonna chicken out. If it wasn´t by that I guess I would have hardly got into many or any fight at all. I´m even the kind of person that comes to separate people fighting, contrary to the stupid mass which just films them with their cellphones. But yes I remember too the fact of feeling no pain at all and that of winning a fight you´re expected to lose. kinda gives you an euphoric burst.

[MrBlackCat]

Gambini, on 29 March 2014 - 11:53 PM, said:

So I was in my time machine reliving scenes of my life and how I remember all details of the previous moments of being involved in a physical fight.
<snip>
So I was thinking that I´d write about those memories but while I wrote the last pharagraph I realized that nobody would give a damn about it and that I´m not even sure why I´m writting this.

I think there are a several members here who would at least like to hear about the ones you lost... so they would give a damn.

(sorry, couldn't resist)

Like Ronan said about missing it... In psychology, it is a simple formula. Our memories and experiences are great, but erode and then back-fill with modifications based on our current state of mind with time. The often need to be refreshed in order to maintain their original full effect. This seems to be fairly even in instances of being positive or negative experiences. In other words, it is good to relive situations, IF you desire a constantly updated reality. This does defeat nostalgic modification to memories which some prefer obviously.

The point being, that if you want to maintain a grip on reality, you have to live it periodically, not just remember it. It is my observation that most people prefer the lack of reality.

For me personally, I fast to experience real hunger, take thousands of pictures of things I make or experience, take defeat in many ways, etc. This includes fighting someone or some situation where I can not win, in at least some way, from arm wrestling to boxing.

I find this helps balance some of the "fantasy" we live due to our entertainment based society here in the USA.

MrBlackCat

[Gambini]

Well I wasn´t going to describe the fights or anything like that. I was remembering the tense situations prior those incidents, all the thoughts that were crossing my mind. One special case in particular as the other was a roadrage incident which didn´t give me a lot of time to think about it. I remember the fear, projecting what´d happen if things went favorable for me or the other way around, the out of control discussion that preceded the figth, etc. You know, now that I think of it, it´s not a very pleasant topic to talk about. It makes me look like I´m bragging out of a fight to some extent, which isn´t the case. I was just very high and having a flashback full of all the little details that I still remember. We make lot of decisions during our lives but few make a change as that one did. While living my adulthood I have gradually been adopting a much lower profile than before. My best achievement during regular days is to go unnoticed by people I don´t have any intention to interact with.

[Forge]

if you want to know about fights, get Tx to start talking

[Sangman]

Gambini, on 29 March 2014 - 03:42 AM, said:

It takes him five days to come back with a "clever" response

You got me

Protected by Viper, on 29 March 2014 - 06:51 AM, said:

Are you kidding me? They're great!

We've got Mikko lying about having a job
Blue Lightning arguing for the sake of his ego
Jimmy being a smart ass
Me being an asshole
And Sang pulling a sperg and telling everyone to "be nice" when we're all having a good time being abrasive (Go sit in the corner, bro)

P.S. Even when it's not Jews, it's Jews.™

Well, now that's pretty immature.

[Lunick]

[High Treason]

Took a bike ride today, didn't go far because the bike is broken - no 3rd gear and 2nd gear slips out of drive - also looking into voluntary work.

In the meantime, I started messing with FM-Drive, a Mega Drive VSTi... I dislike software and would rather use the DX-100 or work with a Mega Drive but both are not an option right now. This is what I've come up with;


I did this obeying the rules of the true hardware however, so only 5 FM channels, 1 DAC, 3 PSG (Square), hard panning (Left, Right or Center only) and only a single not playing at a time on each channel. No FX. It's a repetitive little tune but given the long absence from tampering with this stuff (preffering my Casio CZ over Yamaha's 80's gear that I find rather lacking) I'm still fairly happy with it.

[Jimmy]

Protected by Viper, on 29 March 2014 - 07:26 PM, said:

Just don't mix them with liquor or you'll be two beers away from queer.

You say that like it's a bad thing.

Note to self: Start drinking lime-a-ritas and eating Xannies like candy.

Ronan, on 30 March 2014 - 04:06 AM, said:

Funny you should say that you have clear memory of fighting, I used to fight a lot when I was younger and most fights are a blur to me, I remember the before (making the decision to fight), the after (joy or winning or shittyness of losing) but only flashes from the actual fights. I haven't really been a fight in a couple of years and I kind of miss it, as nothing makes you feel more alive and it's funny how you don't really feel any pain until after. I don't think there is a greater natural high than winning a fight you go into expecting to lose.

Maybe if you stopped drinking Guinness you could remember something, you potato farming piece of shit.
<3